Getting Sick

I have a confession to make. I didn't desire God that much the last few weeks. I got sick. It's the season, you know. Coughs and colds, I mean. I simply stared at the wall clock when it was time for me to get out of bed for my Bible reading. How I wished I could say my spirit was willing and it's only my flesh that was weak. But that wasn't the case. My body and spirit agreed to stay put--in bed!

Guess what, too? My Bible reading is now in the Book of Job! Honestly, that dampened my spirit further. Instead of switching to another less depressing Bible book, I just timed out and wallowed in my own misery. I knew God wanted to tell me something through that book, but I didn't have the spiritual guts to find out. (Coward!) But my journaling lost its vigor and my prayers felt limp and dry. My spirit ached for God and I knew what I had to do.

Now that I'm better (thanks to the mystery of the common cold called recovery), I'm reading my Bible again. I discovered something about myself during my spiritual leave of absence. It takes just a little physical discomfort to lose my desire for God's Word. This is not just about missing a morning routine and getting upset over it. I didn't really love God enough to think of Him and listen to Him during those physically weak times. Ouch! My spiritual pride!

Although reading Job won't be a pleasure trip, I want to learn from it just the same. After all, it IS God's Word. I would be insulting God if I read only the "easy" and "soothing" Bible passages. If I want to know Him more deeply, I will search for Him in every page of His Word. I want my devotion to Him to be constant "in sickness and in health."